Guest Post from Parker: Buck up, Mom. It’s Summer.

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Dear Mom,

I’ve tried to give you a preview of what’s in store for summer, but you still seem to be in denial. This summer, you need to bring your A game. Turn off the Real Housewives, put down that book that you’ve been waiting all year to read. It’s summer. And that means you give ME your full attention. Here’s some tips of how to really make it a great summer all around for me…okay, and Celia too.

Seven Ways to Have a Great Summer with Parker Gallagher

1. Be liberal with the sweet treats. Summer is about eating ice cream and S’mores until you are nauseous. Don’t be a buzz kill and enforce any “one sweet” rules. Don’t think I don’t see the little Oreo binge you have going on when you hide in the pantry. You’re not kidding anyone.

2. Screen Time Unlimited. Let’s just pretend it means you’re a better parent the MORE TV your kid watches. Because debating show/movie/IPad games with you is really exhausting. And, just wondering, when can I have my own Netflix account?

3. Nix the Naps. I will be 4 in December. I think it’s time to face facts. You need a nap more than I do. You are the adult here, Bridge. It’s time to have an extra cup of coffee and just let me play away the afternoon. My summer memories shouldn’t include the pitiful sadness I feel when when you sequester me to my room. It’s such a sad detail for the memoir I will someday write about my childhood.

4. P.S. I know you are not working. You’re a teacher. You have the summer off. Like two whole months. And I know you send me to preschool on some of those days. How do you sleep at night?

5. Negotiations. You really need to ratchet up your negotiation techniques for summer. You are too easily annoyed these days. I’m three and a half, it’s like my job not to take no for an answer.

6. Pajamas. They should be worn all day every day.

7. Sweetie Baby. Lets make a deal, I’ll play with the little sister and give you ten minutes of peace a day if you can maybe get her to stop biting me and putting on my shoes. That would be great, thanks.

Love,
Your Favorite Redhead
Parker